I've admitted it. I can't live without him. Every day I drive myself crazy wanting to talk to him, hoping to see his face again, just thinking about him I break down. With him gone, I feel like a huge chunk of me has disappeared. Even if I do get to talk to him everyday and share the same laughs and smiles with each other, knowing that it's nothing more than a friendly conversation doesn't do me any good. It's only a temporary high to get me through the rest of the day or to give me a good night's sleep. I'm so empty knowing my feelings won't reach his heart. I can tell him over and over how much I still care for him, how I'll continue to care for him throughout this year separated, but the way I want him to feel isn't exchanged back to me. I know he cares about me somewhere in his heart, but it's nothing more than caring. Being a really close friend isn't what I hoped for. Throughout these months I really considered this as going back to the beginning. Trying to get close to each other again just like in November 2009. The only problem is, I have too many memories I can't just let go of. And... it shouldn't take eight months to figure out you like someone... But if I even stand a chance, I won't know until then. And then I may never see him again even after that. He'll go away again, and leave me again.
What I've learned during these past four months is that I really do love him. If I've ever questioned myself about it before I know it's for real now. The problem is, love can never take you all the way. You can love someone so much but that alone can't make them happy. I've learned that. I thought I shown my love in many different ways. I took time to send him letters, make things, write my feelings for him (the good and bad), become interested in things that he is, and write 101 memories together. I've never received a letter back... I've never received a card... I asked for a letter, just a single letter... it was one of the things I've always wanted in a relationship; a letter from the person you care about from another country. I've never received anything. I'm not worth the trip to the post office.
I've been single since October. We never made it for a year.
The day he told me it was over I couldn't believe it. I never knew how much he started to dislike me, he never showed any negative emotion the weeks beforehand. I wonder sometimes if it was really my fault to begin with then. It was sudden, when he told me all the reasons for doing this.
If I'm single, I need to start acting it. Because I'm in love with someone who refuses to love me until his year abroad is over. If I've been ignorant for most of my life, I think I can recognize ignorance from others as well.
Today needs to be the day I fix myself. I can't do this to myself anymore. He's not a bad guy, he's worth every effort I've put into trying to have him back in my life. But we're aren't complicated, we're not separated. He told me he's single, he told me it's over. I'm playing a game that won't end until I see junior year. The days I think I've gotten closer don't mean anything to him. It's always the same answer.
I love him. I'll always love him.
I made wishes, and I thought I'd hope for the best once the new year started at midnight. But maybe this is what I need to be a stronger person. I need to stop sending my feelings across the distance because they aren't registering on the other line.
I'm still going to be here. I'm still going to be waiting.
Even though I'm waiting, I don't want to pray everyday that maybe today would be the day I wouldn't have to wait anymore. I know already he'll never tell me.
I honestly don't think I'm good enough for him. Our personalities don't match. I'm not attractive enough.
But the fact that I love him will never change. I just need to be stronger and find a way without him for these next eight months. It's not going to be easy, but... he's not worth the constant crying over. Not anymore, for now.
Saturday, January 1, 2011
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Last post of the year? I want to welcome 2011 with hope
Christmas has past and it wasn't so terrible this year. I mean, I wasn't in much of a Christmas spirit and it didn't even feel like Christmas to me; just another day. It just means I'm getting older and beginning to realize Christmas is just not that holiday like it was when we were kids anymore. I don't care about presents anymore or about money or really about receiving anything. I realize our financial position more and more, I realize how expensive college really is, and I see the burden it puts on my parents. So in reality... Christmas just got me upset when my parents gave me more money than I needed. It wasn't necessary and it should have went towards paying my tuition or rent. But I've been yelled at plenty of times from my family when I try to explain my point of view, receiving the same statement "If someone gives you money don't complain and just say thank you". There's nothing wrong with that theory, but when you clearly know you don't deserve it and the people giving you it can use it more than yourself then I think I have a right to complain. Because it doesn't belong to me.
As for my break, it still has been pretty dull. I'm trying to come up with a good story though. I've been reading fan-fictions on a variety of shows/games of pairings lately and it makes me feel like I failed. Middle school I wrote sooo much. I had a Quizilla account and posted stories like crazy. My account still exists but I'm too embarrassed to post my information here haha. I don't need anyone reading them. I thought I was a good writer when I was doing it but now that I look back on them I feel like an idiot haha. It's just so embarrassing! It's not all terrible, it's enjoyable to read some of it but still haha... I don't think I'm willing to share :)
But fan-fiction has gotten into me again and I really want to write a better love story that doesn't involve vampires like my other ones. I was that vampire story writer as a teen, I thought vampires made everything so much more... sensual. lol If you understand me. But now with this vampire faze going through America right now it disgusts me and I don't want to fall in play with them again. I need something at least a little more realistic now.
And here comes the new year.
I have resolutions,
+Not going to fail this year, I'm going to write a story
+I'm going to lose weight
+I'm going to be a happier person
+Try to keep going strong
+Study harder and get good grades
+Try to focus more on myself
I have wishes,
+
+
+
I'm sure you can guess what they are without me typing them considering what my blogs are usually about...
I thought about it a lot. And I know once it becomes 2011... it becomes eight months... and eight months is a little long... too long actually. But, I can't find a good reason to give up yet. I mean, why give up on something good? It's going to be another stressful year. Maybe 2010 and 2011 will be my worst years in the end. But... it's at least worth a try, worth a wish, worth holding on to even if it's the smallest glint of hope. 2011 I'm going to turn 20. At that age, I feel like this year needs to be more serious, more responsible on my part. I can't give up until I'm certain it's a hopeless cause.
2011, I want this to be a year of improvement, a year of growing, a year of accomplishment, a year of something magical. lol
Happy New Year, everyone :) Let's all wish for the best
As for my break, it still has been pretty dull. I'm trying to come up with a good story though. I've been reading fan-fictions on a variety of shows/games of pairings lately and it makes me feel like I failed. Middle school I wrote sooo much. I had a Quizilla account and posted stories like crazy. My account still exists but I'm too embarrassed to post my information here haha. I don't need anyone reading them. I thought I was a good writer when I was doing it but now that I look back on them I feel like an idiot haha. It's just so embarrassing! It's not all terrible, it's enjoyable to read some of it but still haha... I don't think I'm willing to share :)
But fan-fiction has gotten into me again and I really want to write a better love story that doesn't involve vampires like my other ones. I was that vampire story writer as a teen, I thought vampires made everything so much more... sensual. lol If you understand me. But now with this vampire faze going through America right now it disgusts me and I don't want to fall in play with them again. I need something at least a little more realistic now.
And here comes the new year.
I have resolutions,
+Not going to fail this year, I'm going to write a story
+I'm going to lose weight
+I'm going to be a happier person
+Try to keep going strong
+Study harder and get good grades
+Try to focus more on myself
I have wishes,
+
+
+
I'm sure you can guess what they are without me typing them considering what my blogs are usually about...
I thought about it a lot. And I know once it becomes 2011... it becomes eight months... and eight months is a little long... too long actually. But, I can't find a good reason to give up yet. I mean, why give up on something good? It's going to be another stressful year. Maybe 2010 and 2011 will be my worst years in the end. But... it's at least worth a try, worth a wish, worth holding on to even if it's the smallest glint of hope. 2011 I'm going to turn 20. At that age, I feel like this year needs to be more serious, more responsible on my part. I can't give up until I'm certain it's a hopeless cause.
2011, I want this to be a year of improvement, a year of growing, a year of accomplishment, a year of something magical. lol
Happy New Year, everyone :) Let's all wish for the best
Saturday, December 25, 2010
If only that single smile could tell me those 1000 words
If I lock the voice, cover my eyes, change this picture, erase the wounds, redraw the expression, subtitle the dialogue, release the air, capture a wish, clip our emotions, pin my hair, forget the image, scream, color in the mistakes, hide reality, pull the dream, call further, reach further, wipe this salt, record in black and white, then it can be that way it will be.
To think. This became everything.
To think. This became everything.
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Give me one hour and I'll tell you Merry Christmas Eve :)
Pennsylvania.
A dreadful place.
Day 3 and I'm already ready to die. About 12 days left on the countdown. I need some encouragement here. No snow, no dog in the house, hating Hazleton once I stepped foot in it after all these months. Ugh. I don't belong here and I want to go back to Albany. It's the closest thing to home I feel, even if my room is a little too small. Well, at least I have a room there. I've been sleeping on my couches the past three nights due to 1) my bedroom is super cold and 2) I don't even have a bed because it's been moved to Albany. I can't say I've been getting good rest. My first night I felt so tight on my downstairs couch (the WARMEST place in the house) which gave me a hard time to sleep, then last night I couldn't sleep at all and I was on my upstairs couch. But there was a different reason why I couldn't sleep at all. Thinking a little too much again. A well known habit of mine.
I feel too lazy here. I planned on studying but I haven't even picked up my books. I've been waking up, watching movies, computer, filming, editing a movie, napping. My life. Oh and eating too much again. I'm not really in a bad mood, but I'm just disappointed, added to a bit of loneliness, I think you can see how my days are. When I'm in Albany I'm away from these feelings most of the time. This place... is seriously my deathbed.
I feel a lot closer to the people I know in Albany. I come here and I don't even say a word to the people I used to know. It's why I'm stuck in the house all the time. I don't know why that is. I think I'm just meant to wander. Like, I've never had a difficult time making friends in my life (excluding elementary school). I've never seen myself as someone to be a troublesome friend. But like, it's almost like I can't keep it forever. Once I move on it's like everything else gets left behind as well. It's not a very good thing at all, but somehow my personality has shaped me that way. Or maybe I'm wrong. Because I still keep in very good touch with most of my friends in Japan and it's been two years now. So maybe it's because of the idea of Pennsylvania. I think I'm just trying to escape it so much I'm trying to neglect everything associated with it. I'm not sure... it's really something to ponder about. But I feel like I don't want to forget the people in Albany... why is that?
I try to ignore it anymore.
A lot of different things have been floating in my mind. After watching two movies yesterday, Ip Man one and two, I've noticed different things about myself and others and more truth about the Chinese people. If no one has watched the movies I suggest you do, especially the first one. I don't care if you hate movies with subtitles or what, it needs to be seen. If everyone could just imagine how other people have to live, the feelings of others who are different.... honestly this topic deserves its own blog. I've felt disgusted. I suppose I'll save this for another day. But the point is... the Chinese aren't dirt. I'm not saying I believed exactly that but I did criticized them a little in my own way in the back of my mind. And it's a shame that I'm not alone.
Christmas...
I'm still going to make a wish :)
A dreadful place.
Day 3 and I'm already ready to die. About 12 days left on the countdown. I need some encouragement here. No snow, no dog in the house, hating Hazleton once I stepped foot in it after all these months. Ugh. I don't belong here and I want to go back to Albany. It's the closest thing to home I feel, even if my room is a little too small. Well, at least I have a room there. I've been sleeping on my couches the past three nights due to 1) my bedroom is super cold and 2) I don't even have a bed because it's been moved to Albany. I can't say I've been getting good rest. My first night I felt so tight on my downstairs couch (the WARMEST place in the house) which gave me a hard time to sleep, then last night I couldn't sleep at all and I was on my upstairs couch. But there was a different reason why I couldn't sleep at all. Thinking a little too much again. A well known habit of mine.
I feel too lazy here. I planned on studying but I haven't even picked up my books. I've been waking up, watching movies, computer, filming, editing a movie, napping. My life. Oh and eating too much again. I'm not really in a bad mood, but I'm just disappointed, added to a bit of loneliness, I think you can see how my days are. When I'm in Albany I'm away from these feelings most of the time. This place... is seriously my deathbed.
I feel a lot closer to the people I know in Albany. I come here and I don't even say a word to the people I used to know. It's why I'm stuck in the house all the time. I don't know why that is. I think I'm just meant to wander. Like, I've never had a difficult time making friends in my life (excluding elementary school). I've never seen myself as someone to be a troublesome friend. But like, it's almost like I can't keep it forever. Once I move on it's like everything else gets left behind as well. It's not a very good thing at all, but somehow my personality has shaped me that way. Or maybe I'm wrong. Because I still keep in very good touch with most of my friends in Japan and it's been two years now. So maybe it's because of the idea of Pennsylvania. I think I'm just trying to escape it so much I'm trying to neglect everything associated with it. I'm not sure... it's really something to ponder about. But I feel like I don't want to forget the people in Albany... why is that?
I try to ignore it anymore.
A lot of different things have been floating in my mind. After watching two movies yesterday, Ip Man one and two, I've noticed different things about myself and others and more truth about the Chinese people. If no one has watched the movies I suggest you do, especially the first one. I don't care if you hate movies with subtitles or what, it needs to be seen. If everyone could just imagine how other people have to live, the feelings of others who are different.... honestly this topic deserves its own blog. I've felt disgusted. I suppose I'll save this for another day. But the point is... the Chinese aren't dirt. I'm not saying I believed exactly that but I did criticized them a little in my own way in the back of my mind. And it's a shame that I'm not alone.
Christmas...
I'm still going to make a wish :)
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
EXIT
I'm back home in Pennsylvania and to be honest it kinda sucks. As soon as I got here I had a decision to make. Sleep at my mom's or sleep at my dad's. Ugh. I'm trying not to hurt either of their feelings, and I know my mom really wants to make up what happened back in June but do I really have to be put in such a position? Either way it ended up me sleeping at my dad's. I'll be here for a few nights then I'll have to switch. My dog isn't in the house either which makes this whole staying here over night kinda pointless lol. I missed my dog so much but my dad said she's been on her period so in order for no stains on the carpet she's outside. I don't understand how it can take over a week for her to get over her period. Poor thing... thank god I'm not a dog for that.
I ended up timing my buses wrong. I took a 7:30am bus out of Albany, arrived in NYC at 10am, then had to wait until 4pm until my next bus to PA at Penn Station. I waited 6hrs. sitting on that hard, tiled floor. Unbelievable, right? I should get a reward. Waiting 6hrs. doing absolutely nothing at a bus terminal means I can wait an entire year for you!! Patience dammit!! LOL. No.
I'm not in a Christmas mood. I'm not exactly sure what it is but it feels so empty. Like boring. I was actually all up and excited the week beforehand about coming, but maybe it was just because I was excited about the snow. The snow that is currently non-existent lol. I still have to write Christmas cards and I'm not very in the mood to do so. -sigh- Such has become this vacation. But I really need to send out those cards. It's the 22nd today.... I MUST SEND THEM OUT TOMORROW. Wien's is the only one I made sure to get out asap haha, geeze...
Yesterday I slept in until 4pm. I couldn't believe it. And it really pissed me off too. I mean, I woke up to the sun going down, get out of the shower to a setted sun. It was a FML moment for sure. Received an early Christmas gift from my mom :) I really like it too. Today I'm awake now though so for sure I will not sleep again! I've got things to do. At least more productive things. I kinda want to tell everyone what me and my sister did for our parents this Christmas. We decided back in July that we wanted to do something really big for them this year and something for once that they could actually use. We both went half on both presents. For my mom, we're paying her mortgage for a month: $500. For my dad we're buying him a new washer: ~$300. Pretty good, right? We've been saving so... and I really think this is a good present. My mom has nooo idea and I can see her being brought to tears. I'm going to feel reallly uncomfortable if that happens though lol but hey, it means she appreciates it.
A Hapibara-san Christmas♥
I ended up timing my buses wrong. I took a 7:30am bus out of Albany, arrived in NYC at 10am, then had to wait until 4pm until my next bus to PA at Penn Station. I waited 6hrs. sitting on that hard, tiled floor. Unbelievable, right? I should get a reward. Waiting 6hrs. doing absolutely nothing at a bus terminal means I can wait an entire year for you!! Patience dammit!! LOL. No.
I'm not in a Christmas mood. I'm not exactly sure what it is but it feels so empty. Like boring. I was actually all up and excited the week beforehand about coming, but maybe it was just because I was excited about the snow. The snow that is currently non-existent lol. I still have to write Christmas cards and I'm not very in the mood to do so. -sigh- Such has become this vacation. But I really need to send out those cards. It's the 22nd today.... I MUST SEND THEM OUT TOMORROW. Wien's is the only one I made sure to get out asap haha, geeze...
Yesterday I slept in until 4pm. I couldn't believe it. And it really pissed me off too. I mean, I woke up to the sun going down, get out of the shower to a setted sun. It was a FML moment for sure. Received an early Christmas gift from my mom :) I really like it too. Today I'm awake now though so for sure I will not sleep again! I've got things to do. At least more productive things. I kinda want to tell everyone what me and my sister did for our parents this Christmas. We decided back in July that we wanted to do something really big for them this year and something for once that they could actually use. We both went half on both presents. For my mom, we're paying her mortgage for a month: $500. For my dad we're buying him a new washer: ~$300. Pretty good, right? We've been saving so... and I really think this is a good present. My mom has nooo idea and I can see her being brought to tears. I'm going to feel reallly uncomfortable if that happens though lol but hey, it means she appreciates it.
A Hapibara-san Christmas♥
Sunday, December 19, 2010
Meltdown;
I'm going home tomorrow, Greyhound bus departs from Albany at 7:30am. Arrival in NYC, probably around 10-11am. I haven't bought my ticket to Hazleton PA just yet. If I went with Greyhound they were to have be go to Binghamton then switch there then switch again in Scranton. FOR $81 ONE WAY. Bull. No way am I going to pay that much. I remember taking Susquehanna Trailways from NYC and I'm suree, no POSITIVE, it's going to be cheaper than that. But if you look on their site their schedule makes no sense and it seems like a bus may not even be leaving on Monday. Whatever. I'll buy a Greyhound bus then if I have to. But in the end I'll probably be home around 9-9:30pm. What a full day blown, right?
I guess I'm happy to go back.
I would really like a break from work for these two weeks and I need to get back to studying. I haven't touched my Japanese or Cantonese in such a long time. Korean well..... I'm leaving that serious study for the summer. I've decided to go for a lot of New Years Resolutions this year. I always tried to do something but they never fall through, at least most of my hopes. But this year I think I can do it. I've been really lazy this past semester, it really bothers me. I feel like all I've done for my languages has been a waste of my time and for my Japanese.... it's just really luck that I've been there for a year and now have developed quickness for recognizing kanji ready for the tests. Or else I just may be struggling like some of the people in my class.
As for being back in PA, well I feel like I'll enjoy it for so long and then as always I'll get bored of it. I can't wait to see the snow, that's for sure, and with this approaching storm things should get better (I lovee snowstorms). And I mean, I'm only there for two weeks anyway so it shouldn't be too bad. I really miss laying with my dog though lol. She's awesome.
Life has been such a big spin.
At least this past semester. I can't wait till it all slows down which seems impossible until I leave this apartment for the time being. I need a more organized room, a bigger area to lay on the floor and close my eyes, a backyard covered with snow so I can lay down and stare at the stars; just a place to breathe for a short time. Get my thoughts together about everything. I've probably been a mess and haven't realized it. So I think this short vacation will do me some good.
I have a project to do while I'm there too. Shhh ;)
I'll be stuck in NYC for probably 6 or so hours. Wish I had someone to take me around NYC again since I'll be stuck there but, maybe next year :) Guess I'll pick a spot at Penn Station buy a few cookies, and study. And then... well, I'll close my eyes and I'll fall back into the snow.
Here I come.
I guess I'm happy to go back.
I would really like a break from work for these two weeks and I need to get back to studying. I haven't touched my Japanese or Cantonese in such a long time. Korean well..... I'm leaving that serious study for the summer. I've decided to go for a lot of New Years Resolutions this year. I always tried to do something but they never fall through, at least most of my hopes. But this year I think I can do it. I've been really lazy this past semester, it really bothers me. I feel like all I've done for my languages has been a waste of my time and for my Japanese.... it's just really luck that I've been there for a year and now have developed quickness for recognizing kanji ready for the tests. Or else I just may be struggling like some of the people in my class.
As for being back in PA, well I feel like I'll enjoy it for so long and then as always I'll get bored of it. I can't wait to see the snow, that's for sure, and with this approaching storm things should get better (I lovee snowstorms). And I mean, I'm only there for two weeks anyway so it shouldn't be too bad. I really miss laying with my dog though lol. She's awesome.
Life has been such a big spin.
At least this past semester. I can't wait till it all slows down which seems impossible until I leave this apartment for the time being. I need a more organized room, a bigger area to lay on the floor and close my eyes, a backyard covered with snow so I can lay down and stare at the stars; just a place to breathe for a short time. Get my thoughts together about everything. I've probably been a mess and haven't realized it. So I think this short vacation will do me some good.
I have a project to do while I'm there too. Shhh ;)
I'll be stuck in NYC for probably 6 or so hours. Wish I had someone to take me around NYC again since I'll be stuck there but, maybe next year :) Guess I'll pick a spot at Penn Station buy a few cookies, and study. And then... well, I'll close my eyes and I'll fall back into the snow.
Here I come.
Saturday, December 11, 2010
A new name, a new face; winter romance movie session begins
Judging from everything, I think this needed a new taste.
Life isn't just about living for something amazing all the time. Maybe, it's just learning just how far you can take things and discovering what things can mean to you. I'm not living more, I'm beginning to learn how to.
I got obsessive again. This time with early 1920-1940 themed romance movies. Something about them makes me feel closer to them. Actually I think there's a key word as to why lol but I don't feel like revealing it. I watched a film over the summer called "The Painted Veil". I'm not exactly sure of the significance of the title but the movie is quite beautiful and I do suggest it for anyone wanting a good story. Here's the sypnopsis.
"A British medical doctor fights a cholera outbreak in a small Chinese village, while also being trapped at home in a loveless marriage to an unfaithful wife. " The Painted Veil movie trailer♥
I've honestly never loved such a movie, well AMERICAN movie, as much as this one. Love it sooo much I went and bought the book today!! I think during Christmas break I'm going to look for more romance movies based between those times periods again. Oh gosh, I just realized The Notebook is one of them.... I'm also going to start a movie collection of all my favorites. I was on the hunt for this movie as well when I bought the book but could you believe that Best Buy OR Fye did not have it??? I was unbelievably disappointed. Now I have to buy it online :'( Such is so....
Second movie I happened to watch was "Atonement". This movie was so... I was really heartbroken at the end, coming to tears. Synopsis: "Fledgling writer Briony Tallis, as a 13-year-old, irrevocably changes the course of several lives when she accuses her older sister's lover of a crime he did not commit." Atonement movie trailer♥
I hear it's a confusing movie and is needed to watch about three times before you can grasp its portraying of the story and I can understand why many would say that as well. But I understood it just perfectly. Sure, there was a part, especially in the beginning where I was like, "Wait, you mean you just went backwards now?" and then I realized what was going on and I kinda just got used to it. Clearly not as such an amazing story as The Painted Veil but I give this movie its credit. It reveals something deeper than The Painted Veil had given. Like... maybe I'm crazy but for what those two people went through.... especially how it went down in the end... I just felt something horrifying but yet beautiful. This story will most likely also become part of my winter reading list. Actually, yes. I will go out and buy it once exams are finished.
Both of these movies will be going into my collection. And so will these novels. I look forward to my next new discovery, my next movie♥
Life isn't just about living for something amazing all the time. Maybe, it's just learning just how far you can take things and discovering what things can mean to you. I'm not living more, I'm beginning to learn how to.
I got obsessive again. This time with early 1920-1940 themed romance movies. Something about them makes me feel closer to them. Actually I think there's a key word as to why lol but I don't feel like revealing it. I watched a film over the summer called "The Painted Veil". I'm not exactly sure of the significance of the title but the movie is quite beautiful and I do suggest it for anyone wanting a good story. Here's the sypnopsis.
"A British medical doctor fights a cholera outbreak in a small Chinese village, while also being trapped at home in a loveless marriage to an unfaithful wife. " The Painted Veil movie trailer♥I've honestly never loved such a movie, well AMERICAN movie, as much as this one. Love it sooo much I went and bought the book today!! I think during Christmas break I'm going to look for more romance movies based between those times periods again. Oh gosh, I just realized The Notebook is one of them.... I'm also going to start a movie collection of all my favorites. I was on the hunt for this movie as well when I bought the book but could you believe that Best Buy OR Fye did not have it??? I was unbelievably disappointed. Now I have to buy it online :'( Such is so....
Second movie I happened to watch was "Atonement". This movie was so... I was really heartbroken at the end, coming to tears. Synopsis: "Fledgling writer Briony Tallis, as a 13-year-old, irrevocably changes the course of several lives when she accuses her older sister's lover of a crime he did not commit." Atonement movie trailer♥ I hear it's a confusing movie and is needed to watch about three times before you can grasp its portraying of the story and I can understand why many would say that as well. But I understood it just perfectly. Sure, there was a part, especially in the beginning where I was like, "Wait, you mean you just went backwards now?" and then I realized what was going on and I kinda just got used to it. Clearly not as such an amazing story as The Painted Veil but I give this movie its credit. It reveals something deeper than The Painted Veil had given. Like... maybe I'm crazy but for what those two people went through.... especially how it went down in the end... I just felt something horrifying but yet beautiful. This story will most likely also become part of my winter reading list. Actually, yes. I will go out and buy it once exams are finished.
Both of these movies will be going into my collection. And so will these novels. I look forward to my next new discovery, my next movie♥
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